for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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