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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize