No awkward lesbian experiences without me
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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