dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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