Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
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I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
It's blow job season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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