Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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