Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
the raccoons are back...
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