I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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