my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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