I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize