I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize