dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize