I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
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