Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize