Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize
