I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It's just like the Real World with babies
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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