So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
People in love make me want to vomit
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
