Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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