Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
