She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize