Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
