they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Just high enough for therapy.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
