i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
