Sry I called you an 8
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
not ubering you a puppy
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
