if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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