better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
