If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
you will always have a special place in my vag
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Never joke about your clitoris.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
