i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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