her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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