i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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