I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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