Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
