the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
