Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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