i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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