She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
