I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I hate all girls vehemently.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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