Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
