I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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