we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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