apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
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