In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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