shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
