names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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