Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
