No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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