His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Randomize
