there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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