real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize