ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
