me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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